By: Abby Dizon
College is a time when self-love is truly tested. In high school, you might have felt a sense of competition with peers, and college can intensify those feelings. Since there are more people to compare yourself to, it is easy to question yourself. Still, college offers an opportunity for nurturing self-love and discovery. Here are some strategies to help you improve your self-love.
Start by treating yourself the way you treat your best friends. When your friends are feeling down or are beating themselves up, you encourage them with honest, positive statements and remind them of their strengths and capabilities.
But here’s the thing: You are as human as they are, deserving the same amount and quality of kindness, support and compassion you give others. Similar to how you would want your close friends to believe the affirmations given to them, you should also believe the positive affirmations that are directed to you.
I was never a big fan of positive affirmations. I felt they were insincere and created to make me feel better but had no truth behind them. However, I transformed my mindset and tried to think of myself from my friends’ perspectives. I began to believe that others genuinely see me in a different light and truly believe I am special, beautiful and smart.
By beginning to accept the sincere affirmations of others, you begin to break down the negative self-criticism. After all, if we believe the positive traits we tell our friends, even those they overlook, we should value the positive traits within ourselves.
Break the habit of comparing yourself to others. Whether online or in-person, we constantly measure ourselves against others in terms of physique, intelligence and success, devaluing our accomplishments and unique qualities. While not comparing yourself is easier said than done, this quote explains why uniqueness is so important: “Flowers are pretty, but so are Christmas lights, and they look nothing alike.”
Just as flowers and Christmas lights are both beautiful in their own ways, beauty is subjective and can be found in unexpected places. Each of us is different for a reason; if everyone were the same, no one would be unique.
Building self-love takes time and dedication. It does not happen overnight and is obtained through self-awareness and effort during a transformative journey. Upon reaching self-love, not only does it profoundly impact every aspect of your life, giving you the power to withstand any challenges, but you also gain confidence and a deeper self-connection.
